Train rides and Epiphanies

November 13, 2010

Either you’re in or you’re out. I was sitting on the subway today, and I was noticing all of the people around me. It was about noon so the crowd was slightly different than during the morning or evening hours. I was noticing the advertisements. I was noticing the train’s rocking slightly to and fro, the train on the next track as it whizzed by. I was thinking about the opportunity before me and all of the usual questions that pop up in ones mind when considering making an expensive purchase from a stranger were nervously hitting me. Can I afford it? What if this person is creepy? Why are they selling such a wonderful item? Are they trustworthy? Will it work or worse break in two weeks? Is it worth it? Thats when I stopped. Is it worth it. I turned that question over a few times. I tasted it. I looked at it as if it were new and nothing mattered but that one question. Thats when I realized. Either you’re in or you’re out. It was this epiphany, and our traincar rocking, the silent breath of the others around me, the whir of the train next to us speeding just as fast in the opposite direction, it all became this beautiful symphony. There may as well have been Bernard Hermann music that swelled because all of a sudden, I realized again, what I come to when on the brink of something new, time and time over, that nothing is worth doing if any thing, this thing, is not worth everything. I’ve wanted a Rolliflex medium format camera since I begun developing my own film, seven years ago. I figured it was about time. Welcome to the newest member of my photographic family.


One Response to “Train rides and Epiphanies”

  1. Dasha Says:


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